PAVE Educators Interview with Colorado Parent, read the full article below:
“Dating is just one of the types of relationships we experience, including those with friends, family, teammates, coworkers, etc. If a teen doesn’t want to talk about dating relationships, try talking about overall relationship skills like assertive communication, boundary-setting, and building trust, which are as important in non-romantic relationships as romantic ones. Approach conversations willing to listen—resist the urge to lecture—to encourage teens to talk more openly.”– Nick Sabolik, Intervention Specialist, and Mollie Putnam, Prevention Manager at Project PAVE, an organization dedicated to helping youth build healthy relationships
To our PAVE Family,
We wanted to share the bittersweet news that PAVE’s Executive Director, Adam Evans, will be leaving PAVE to pursue new opportunities. His last day at PAVE will be March 1st.
Since joining PAVE 15 years ago, Adam has contributed so much to the organization and its mission. As Program Director, he helped PAVE’s cultivate new program partners, move ALL PAVE programs into schools, author and develop new programming, and reach countless youth across the Denver Metro area. As Executive Director, Adam oversaw periods of financial stability and growth, expanded PAVE’s programming, stewarded PAVE through the extreme challenges of the pandemic, and created innovative strategic initiatives that have helped the organization thrive.
We will deeply miss Adam and all the expertise, compassion, and leadership he brought to our team. We are grateful for the passion and opportunities he has brought to youth across Denver. He is truly a champion of survivors, youth, and the Denver community. Although we are sad to see him go, we are excited for his next chapter and know he will remain connected to PAVE.
As Adam moves onto his next adventure, PAVE is taking a moment to re-imagine leadership. PAVE is moving to a Co-Executive Director model. This structural change is a part of our equity and inclusivity work and will allow us to utilize the unique strengths of our team and provide stability in the executive leadership roles. One Executive Director will oversee finance, fundraising, and operations with the other Executive Director will oversee programming and partnerships.
Beginning January 3rd, Tara Williams, PAVE’s Associate Director, stepped in as Acting Executive Director. Tara has been with PAVE for ten years, overseeing fundraising and operations. With more than two decades of fundraising and nonprofit experience, we are confident that Tara will keep PAVE on its path of financial stability and programmatic growth. Once we find a Co-Executive Director, Tara will move into the role of Co-Executive Director of Operations and Development.
PAVE’s Board has created a Search Committee to look for the Co-Executive Director of Programs and Partnerships to lead out on strategic direction for our programming and building and growing partnerships. The posting for this job is available on the opportunities page.
As we look for the program executive lead, PAVE’s Intervention Director Stephanie Roman will serve as Program Director. Please reach out to Stephanie at firstname.lastname@example.org for any program service requests, questions, or information.
We are grateful to PAVE’s management team for their continued leadership and to our staff members for their passion and dedication to serve Denver youth during this period of transition.
We will recognize Adam at our Transformations Luncheon on May 3rd. Look for more information later this month.
Should you have questions about this transition, please do not hesitate to reach out to me via email at email@example.com or Tara at firstname.lastname@example.org or 720.414.2537
Case Collard, Board Chair & The entire PAVE Team
- Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month (TDVAM) 2020
“I don’t even know where to start!”
How to Talk to Young People about Healthy Relationships & Teen Dating Violence
- Ask open-ended questions and listen to the answers. Don’t start with advice or comments.
- Stay Calm and as non-judgemental as possible when talking.
- Model healthy relationships and healthy relationship behaviors, including conflict resolutions and owning your emotions. You–not your dating partner–are responsible for managing your emotions.
- Talk early and often about consent. Consent should always be a clear “Yes” that is freely and enthusiastically given!
- Talk about rigid gender roles and stereotypes and how those expectations can hurt us and our relationships.
- Start building your open dialogue about relationships early and be consistent, so that over time these difficult conversations are normalized.
- Start your talk by talking about healthy dating standards and establishing boundaries, rather than dating violence to avoid shaming and shutdown of the conversation.
- Be vulnerable and share some of your “appropriate” adult/youth experiences or mistakes from dating and in relationships. Trusting young people with your difficult experiences and emotions can make them more likely to share with you when they are ready.
- Do not force the conversation–they will speak when they are ready.
- Talk about the ongoing work that healthy relationships require. Help them to establish their own healthy standards and boundaries and to understand healthy vs. abusive relationships (See definitions and warning signs).
- If you suspect a young person is in an unhealthy relationship:
- Be there to offer support
- Talk about behaviors and not the person
- Avoid ultimatums
- Help connect them to resources (including Project PAVE)
- Help them to make a plan to safely end the relationship
Healthy Relationship Behaviors:
- Open, safe and honest communication
- Trust & Acceptance
- Clear Boundaries that respect each partner’s needs
- Mutual love and respect
- Sharing of power equally
- Taking responsibility for emotions and actions
What is Teen Dating Violence?
A pattern of actual or threatened acts of physical, sexual, and/or emotional abuse, used by an adolescent against a current or former dating partner. The abusive teen uses this pattern of violent and coercive behavior, in a heterosexual or same sex dating relationship, in order to gain power and maintain control over the dating partner.
Warning Signs of an Unhealthy Relationship:
- Possessiveness and extreme jealousy
- Unexplained marks or bruises.
- Partner uses threats, shame, blame, and guilt to control their partner
- Using coercion to get sex or physical intimacy
- Partner emails or texts excessively.
- Being told what to wear or do by partner
- Isolation–no longer participating in activities or interests or spending time with friends/family
- Partner has a history of dating violence/has been abused
- Using rigid gender roles to police behavior
- Young person begins to show signs of anxiety/depression
Love is Respect Teen Dating Violence Helpline for Immediate Assistance:
Dial 1-866-331-9474, chat at www.loveisrespect.org or text “loveis” to 22522.
COVID-19 UPDATE FOR OUR COMMUNITY
Caring for Youth & Day-to-day Work (Getting Creative!)
- All of our staff are working from home and using video conferencing to stay in touch and on top of work!
- Intervention Team members are staying connected to as many youth and families as possible via video-conference, phone, and email helping clients to stay safe and manage trauma and other difficulties as they arise. Our team also offers vital support to gain access to financial, food, and other assistance.
- Prevention Team members are working on web-based content to push out to youth who would otherwise be at our in-person sessions and providing consultation to other professionals who are working remotely as well.
- Youth Educators are meeting remotely, exchanging a lot of texts, emails, and calls. They are a vital source of ideas and will be helping us create new content to reach others virtually.
Financial Stability (Holding Strong!)
- As of today, we are not projecting any immediate need to drastically reduce our expenses thanks to years of careful budgeting and financial management. We are proactively working on a budget contingency plan and policies that will allow us to continue our work without significant interruptions.
- We’ve been in touch with most of our major funders (government, private, foundations) and don’t anticipate any interruptions to grant funds at this time but anticipate some losses in other areas.
Transformations Luncheon 2020 (GOING VIRTUAL!)
- Our annual celebration will be different, but we’re excited about what we can do virtually to connect with each of you and highlight the amazing young people of Project PAVE. This event is a major fundraiser to support our work so we hope many of you will still be able to participate!
- Our team is working on a new experience that allows anyone to join us, no matter how far away you are! Stay tuned for more details.
We recognize that isolation of any type can be incredibly stressful on youth and their families, especially those who are experiencing violence or who are recovering from trauma and now find themselves disconnected from their schools and the resources they provide. PAVE is here and we are continuing to reach as many youth as possible. We are incredibly grateful for your ongoing support to help us provide continued services!
Please be in touch with any questions or if the PAVE team can be of assistance to you.
Virtual Transformations Luncheon Update:
We have made the difficult but appropriate decision to not host our Transformations Luncheon on May 5th. This decision is made with guidance from the CDC and public health officials in Colorado to cancel large events and also aligns with PAVE’s vision of safe communities.
In the coming days, we will share what we have planned in its place to provide much-needed funds to support our work to end violence in our community and to allow us all to celebrate extraordinary youth changemakers. During these challenging times, we will need your support to continue serving young people, families, and our community.
Today and every day, PAVE remains committed to our mission and to safe, healthy communities. Together, we will get through this!
Stay tuned for more updates coming soon!
The PAVE Team
It’s Teen Violence Awareness Month!
Take some time this month to talk to your teen, friend or peer about healthy relationships.
You can now donate all or part of your state tax refund to Project PAVE! PAVE’s registration number to enter on your tax return is:
Creative Ways to Support PAVE
Do you shop at King Soopers? Support PAVE while you shop!!!
If you connect your King Soopers card to Project PAVE, King Soopers will donate directly to PAVE every time you shop!
To register, go to www.kingsoopers.com and log in to your account. Once logged into your King Soopers or City Market account, search for Project PAVE Inc. either by name or DD585 and then click Enroll.
New users will need to create an account which requires some basic information, a valid email address and a loyalty card.
Let’s raise awareness together!
Follow Project PAVE on Facebook and Instagram to like and share our posts